Key Themes:
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Sex and silence
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Intimacy and dependency
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Desire and shame
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Love and control
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Freedom and fear
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A search for identity
Key Themes:
-
Sex and silence
-
Intimacy and dependency
-
Desire and shame
-
Love and control
-
Freedom and fear
-
A search for identity
This book is for you if:
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You've had to search for answers on your own.
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You've ever felt that something was wrong with you.
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You've experienced a toxic relationship.
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You know what it feels like to be ashamed of your own body or desires.
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You want to read stories free from pretence and taboo.
Annotation
Without Instructions is a mirror-book for every woman. It speaks to an entire generation of girls who grew up starved of information — without sex education, without support, and without the freedom to ask the very questions that were considered "too uncomfortable" to discuss.
It was a time when fragments of conversations with older friends were often the only source of knowledge about our own bodies — and somehow, that was supposed to be enough.
At the heart of the book is the journey of one woman, woven together from dozens of real-life experiences. Beginning at a hesitant sixteen and stretching into married adulthood, her story follows a lifelong search for understanding. With honesty, vulnerability, and no censorship, she shares how she discovered sex, made mistakes, felt shame, faced fear, and tried to define what was "normal" in a world determined to stay silent.
This book is a mosaic of candid stories — sometimes funny, sometimes heartbreaking, sometimes painful. It explores the secrets we never dared say aloud and the experiences that felt like deeply personal shame, only to reveal themselves as something shared by thousands of other women.
There is no fiction here, but neither is it a memoir. It is a collective manifesto, a voice for a generation.
As you turn the pages, chances are you'll recognize a part of yourself.
Questions to the author
Anhelina Aleksandrenko
The author of the debut novel "Without instructions"
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How was the protagonist created if she isn't your direct alter ego?
The protagonist doesn't have a name. Because she is you, me, your friend, your sister, your mother, or your grandmother. She is stitched together from fragments — different stories, different women. Brave, yet sometimes uncertain. The way every one of us can be. Of course, there is more of me in her than anyone else. It's simply easier to write from your own experience.
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What myth about sex or relationships do you think has the greatest impact on women's lives?
"Endure."
At one point, I even considered making that the title of the book.
For generations, women have been taught to endure — to adapt themselves to their partners' desires. Alongside that comes the myth that you should only ever have one partner, that you shouldn't have sex unless you're in a relationship, and that you shouldn't say no if a man wants you. But you can. You can say no. And you have every right to choose what brings you joy. Live for your own happiness, dear women.
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What was the most difficult part of writing this book?
The hardest chapters to write were the ones about masturbation and abusive relationships. Writing about masturbation felt difficult because it seemed like I was talking about something no one was supposed to know. It's one of the few chapters that, I'm sure, made me blush while writing it.
The chapters about abusive relationships were emotionally difficult for a different reason. I felt sorry for the protagonist. I remembered my own experiences and felt that pain again.
I wanted to tell her not to believe her abuser and to run as far away as possible. But I couldn't, because I needed readers to witness that journey for themselves.
I believe that at least one wonderful woman currently trapped in a similar relationship will read those chapters, recognize herself, and choose to save herself.
If you're reading this now, let me give you a hug.
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What would you like a reader to feel after turning the last page?
Relief. As if she had just had an honest, heartfelt conversation with a close friend about all those stories that feel painfully familiar. More than anything, I want her to understand that she is normal — and always has been. That there is no shame in talking about these experiences, because they are far more common, and far more shared, than we are often led to believe.
